Not Happy

I know its been awhile since Ive blogged. Dad got sick again and Ive been doing a lot of running up and down the road to him. And its made me realize some things in all the time I have gotten to think.

And once again I'm not happy. I'm really thinking it is me. Ive once again tried to talk to John but nothing changes. He said things will and they don't. Him working seven days a week and spending no time with his family is taking its toll. I constantly get yelled at and get blamed for things. Or I get the attitude because he's pissed off because something hasn't gone right.

And now Ive decided to go back to work full time. How this is going to work I don't know. I will now be working and still have all the responsibility of the kids as he stated he will not help. And yes I know millions of women do this every day. But I have no clue have I'm going to work and get three kids to different activities every day. I guess this in itself will be its own adventure.

I even brought up the whole separating thing. It might have been mean to say, but I flat out asked him whats the point of having him if I will still be taking care of the house and kids and working? But I don't even know if separating is the answer. All I know is I'm not happy and that needs to change because its affecting me every day.