Well, Sh#t Just Got Real!

Yes it sure did! At 832am yesterday, I received a phone call from John, that I deep down inside knew was coming at some point. He was let go from his job. Reasons that I wont go into at this time.

So back to no job. Well does this hurt us? Yes and no. More money is made by him working on the farm and in the river. But we did loose insurance. Not a great thing when I'm a diabetic and have asthma. And my worst season is fast approaching for asthma. We looked at plans for self pay but they will run us $600-1000 a month. Not including dental. Luckily my best friend Jessica said look into state insurance. And I did, so I am applying for that for the kids. I will relook at policies for us. Hopefully we don't need  do this long.

Now onto the do I get a job? That I do not know. John says no. I say yes. Still praying for guidance on that one. We don't just want to up and change everything, especially for the kids all at one time. And if I was to get a job right now, it would drastically change all summer plans. The only summer plans I'm really worried about is the week at Girl Scout Camp and Sara's dance recital. The others could just bite it!

Yes, I Know

I haven't done what I said I was going to. That's because I have been hashing out my thoughts and feelings on Facebook. Which has become quite comical. People started looking forward to my weekly sound offs! After a really good conversation with my dad, I realized that my life needed to change. I walked away from something that I never thought I would. I learned I needed to stop taking the bs in my life as well as my family. And I also learned that some people just needed to go from my life. And I have been doing just that.

As of today more big changes are happening. Or are going to. Well, both. Still praying for guidance on that situation. So stay tuned. And as the guys at the firehouse say " Shits about to get real up in here"

The Christmas I Put My Foot Down

Yes I know its almost at the end of January. No one ever said I was on top of things! ;)

 So I think after Christmas of 2011 I vented my frustrations about having to do 5 Christmas' in two days. Ridiculous. Its no fun to rush rush rush. Then open all your presents and have to leave to not come home till 10 or 11 that night. Especially spending time with a family who couldn't care less about you the other 364 days in the year. So I said no more. And guess what? We didn't do not one Christmas but our own. It was GREAT! We slept in, opened our presents, made breakfast then the boys went hunting. I cooked dinner and we just chilled the rest of the day. Couldn't have asked for a better day. And just to back things up for a minute, we even went to two services on Christmas Eve. I think this will be our new normal! And I'm sure plenty had something to say, but guess what? I no longer care what "they" think. They can suck it!

Happy New Year!

Ok so its the 6. Shut it! So whats new with us? Well to start, my dad's tumor has shrunk. Actually all 3 of them. Since he is doing so much better then what the doctor thought, he can do radiation. Next Monday he will start it 5 days a week for 6 weeks. So yea for my dad!

We ended/started our year at a friends house with her two amazing boys. I love seeing that she has become an amazing mother! After all, she was once the wild child! But if you look around her house, you can see the love she has for these two little boys. What really touched me was the craft projects. That is what I like to see hanging up at peoples houses when they have kids.

Nothing else new to report. Working on somethings around the house. Planning a vacation or two!

Stay tuned for a post on Christmas, My Way for Once!

Happy New Year!

Nothing Much New

Not much has changed here lately. Other then cheerleading is OVER! As much as I love it, the schedule for the last month was getting ridiculous. Practice 5 times a week was a little much. But all the hard work for Tina's squad paid off, because they took first place in the 11-13 division! Christmas is getting into full swing. We are actually taking a small life break this weekend and headed to Great Wolf Lodge! And I get to have surgery next week for a kidney stone. That's about all the happenings here! Stand by for some more exciting news!

Dad and The Surgery No Surgery

Last Thursday, dad had his surgery. The plan was to open him along the last surgery lines, take out the bone that was replaced, remove the rest of the tongue and replace the bone with muscle from his chest. I talked to him several times that night and up till he had to go to the OR. Just to back track a second, I spent all day Wednesday with him. It was very hard. We both cried, and he told me things that he thought I needed to know. Stories about before I was born and after.Things that he wished he'd done. So back to the surgery. They took him, cut him open and saw that the tumor has grown to his carotid. So they sewed him back up. They did take some tissue for samples. But there is nothing they could do. And surgery is no longer an option. No radiation either. We can try chemo again, but he hasn't responded the last two times. So who knows. I don't want to think of this as the end. I don't want it to be. I have no idea what I would do if I lost my dad. Though he was around alot when I was younger, I'm a daddy's girl through and through. And like we talked about the day before surgery, I want him to walk me down the isle when we renew our vows. He didn't get to do it the first time. I want other things with him too. Family pictures, Christmas, to sit on the beach and watch the water. And so much more. He said before surgery he was ready for what ever was going to happen. He really didn't think he was going to make it through. But he did. So he has to make it through this.

Really? I mean REALLY?!?

Well looks like we're back at it again. My dad is heading for that nasty battle again. The tumor is back. But this time the game plan has changed. He cant do chemo since he just finished a round and radiation is out of the question. So we are faced with two choices. One, being doing nothing and we have less then a year with him. Two, remove the rest of the tongue, replace it with muscle from his chest. He would be in the hospital for 14 days, then 2 weeks of rehab and then 4 weeks of recovery time. Oh, and the surgery would have to be done by the end of the month. So that's where it stands. We have lots of decisions and praying to do. I'm leaving it to God to point us in the right direction. All I know is I want my time with my daddy. And he knows that. I told him Im being stingy and not ready to let him go. He owes me some back time. And he agreed with me!